The Buzz on Youth Sports

Another Word to Ban on your Team
© Jon Buzby, www.JonBuzby.com

Most coaches have a list of “bad” words that players are forbidden to say. Sometimes it’s part of the written team rules and other times the list is just in a coach’s head so when he hears any of them he can set the record straight for not just the player saying it, but the entire team.

The words included on that list usually start with the letters F, S, and GD. I’d like to add another word to that list that starts with the letter “R”: Retard (and any form of it).

The latest smash hit in theatres, Tropic Thunder, has several scenes using the term, and disability organizations all over the country are outraged. Even though most of your players probably will not have seen the movie due to its “R” rating, I imagine several will have seen clips on the internet.

It’s the perfect opportunity, as coaches and parents involved in youth sports, to jump on board and help eliminate the use of the word.

While most youth sports athletes couldn’t even tell you the technical definition of the term, they do know that it’s a put down, and that’s exactly how they use it.

“That’s retarded!” “Don’t be retarded!” “You’re retarded!” “You retard!” All common uses, heard far too often, in far too many places. Including, unfortunately, occasionally even from the mouths of adults.

My guess is every youth sports team has a member on it with a friend or relative with an intellectual disability (the globally accepted term). Naturally, every time someone on the team uses the “R-word” that person probably cowers, especially if it’s a close friend or relative, and in some cases, even a sibling.

To someone with an intellectual disability, being called “retarded” is like using the “N-word” to refer to an African American. That wouldn’t be acceptable in today’s society by anyone, of any age, in any setting; nor should it be. And neither should the R-word.

When you meet with your team this coming fall, add the “R-word” to your list of unacceptable words. Take the opportunity to educate your players about the term. What it means. Why it can be hurtful. And if you hear it, use the same consequence you would for the other banned words on your list.

You can point out to your players that someone with an intellectual disability just has a weakness (learning), and remind your players that they each have at least one, too.

Kids often look up to their youth sports coaches more than any other influential person in their lives, including us parents. Schools already don’t tolerate the term. If we add one more heavily-populated place that doesn’t accept it – youth sports organizations – we can really make a difference.

And when you think about it, isn’t that why we all coach youth sports.

© 2008 Jon Buzby

Jon Buzby is a successful syndicated columnist and former youth coach. His column, The Buzz on Youth Sports, appears in newspapers and magazines around the country as well as throughout the Internet. His latest books are, "Coaching Kids: It’s More than X’s and O’s" and "Raising a Sports Fanatic." Email your questions or comments to Jon via email or visit his website at www.jonbuzby.com for more information.

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