Bipolar Disorder
By Jodie Lynn

Our 8-year-old has been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. I want to share this with his teacher and principal but his dad disagrees. I think it would offer them insight into his behavior and emotions and be helpful. My husband thinks it would cause them to label him and excuse his behavior as he gets older which would make him an irresponsible person. Is there a happy medium that others have done?

We had our 8-year-old daughter tested for various disorders and the doctor diagnosed her with Bipolar Disorder and put her on medication. For months, her behavior was erratic to the point of resembling a schizophrenic so we got a second opinion. We took her to a Bipolar Disorder specialist who told us that she was not bipolar at all but had a similar disorder. He immediately stopped all of her medication and referred us to a new doctor. - B. V. in Nebraska

If your son is taking medication and he's still acting out in class, he's entitled to an IEP (Individualized Education Program) tailored to meet his needs both academically and behaviorally. My son is in a program with the county and in a class where he is supported by a team of teachers, teacher aides, a psychotherapist, an occupational therapist and he also sees a psychiatrist. He is progressing and thriving with each success and building self-esteem and confidence. We’re all working together to ensure that he takes responsibility for his actions, Bipolar Disorder and his life. The goal is to mainstream him back into a regular classroom once he has learned the skills needed to get along with others in society. You must have clear rules and consequences and stick to them so his disorder is never an excuse for his behavior. - L. B. in CA

From Jodie: Good and bad behavior being blamed on this disorder causes a chain reaction directly correlated with the expectations of emotional, as well as in the physical, capabilities of children. Once your son is stable on medicine, he can live a relatively normal life, though he may not be in a regular classroom at school. Have everyone work together in monitoring his behavior where the medicine can be adjusted in preserving the best strength for the most normal, and well-managed emotional and physical behavior. The teacher will document details about the disorder in your son's personal school file and pass it to each grade and teacher. The new teachers will then asses him and so on. This is what many parents refer to as "labeling." To ensure success, be sure that he takes his medicine on a regular basis, is closely monitored for a possible increase or decrease, and that he is in a classroom setting where he can achieve well. Talk to his teacher to see if there is an alternative program other than his current classroom setting that would better fit his needs in accomplishing this goal.

CAN YOU HELP?

We just found out that our 13-year-old daughter is sneaking off to meet a 15-year-old boy. Her friends' have been lying to us when we call to see how things are going during a sleep-over. They say she is in the bathroom or whatever, and will tell us everything is fine and that they are having a good time. What steps should we take to ensure that she stops seeing him besides not allowing her to go to any sleep-over’s and should we approach the parents of the girls who lied to us?

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Submissions must include writer's first and last names or initials as well as their city and state. Lynn's website is www.parenttoparent.com. Her latest book is "Mom CEO (Chief Everything Officer) - Having, Doing, and Surviving It All!" (Stacey Kannenberg Unlimited, an imprint of Cedar Valley Publishing, $14.95).